Love and Discipline

Like "hand in glove", they fit together

Many Christians believe that a wife is supposed to submit to her husband. If you talk to most evangelicals, they will tell you that the husband has authority over his wife and household.

But, if you say that a bloke has the right to spank his wife if needed to maintain that authority in the home, well, quite often you've got a fight on your hands, mate!

"A man is supposed to love his wife as himself!
How could he discipline her if he loves her?
That is degrading to his wife!"

The arguments are seemingly endless.

However, up until the middle of last century, it was generally thought that a man did have the right of enforcement in his home. Could it perhaps be our culture which has changed, rather than anything to do with Scripture, which causes such an outcry against CDD?

Which one has changed drastically over time, especially in the last fifty or so years?

Scripture or culture?

Of course, a man IS supposed to love his wife as himself, but love does not rule out discipline. In fact, the Bible has only good things to say about discipline.


Discipline is associated with love:

  • As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten...Revelation 3:19a
  • He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes. Proverbs 13:24

Discipline is associated with wisdom and understanding:

  • The rod and reproof give wisdom... Proverbs 29:15
  • ...but a rod is for the back of him that is void of understanding... Proverbs 10:13

Discipline is associated with peace and righteousness:

  • Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous; nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby... Hebrew 12:11



There is no scripture whatsoever that speaks poorly of discipline, and seeing what good things the Bible tells us come from discipline, it begs the question:

How can a man say he loves his wife and not discipline her when needed?